Stud. Femme. Bottom. Top. Transgendered. Bisexual. Queer. Gay. Lesbian. Confused. Questioning. Nasty. Abomination. These are just a few of the labels used in or to describe the LGBTQ community. When put like that it, it sounds crazy right? Yet we, as a community, continue to judge others in our community based on who they sleep with.

All too often, not only in social media but in our day to day lives, there are derogatory comments about how a member of the queer community is living their life. Sometimes it’s a matter of not truly understanding some else’s choices. More often, it’s based on some idea that our way is the only way. Perfect example; a masculine identified woman label’s herself as bisexual. One might think it’s no big deal, but apparently to some, it’s a very big deal. In a recent discussion on Facebook, out of more than one hundred comments, the overwhelming response was one of disgust. But why?

Our community is one of the most marginalized in existence. Not only is it deemed ok by society to discriminate against us, there is currently a bill being considered in our state legislature that in essence encourages business owners to discriminate against members of our community. Though progress is being made, it is still illegal for two consenting adults of the same sex to be married in 33 states. Knowing what we are up against from outside forces, why would we continue to judge one another? Knowing that we are literally fighting for our lives and our rights, why would we fight one another? How can ever expect anyone else to accept us, if we can’t accept one another?

I wonder what ever happened to the idea of live and let live. I often question why it matters what I do behind closed doors as long as all parties involved are consenting adults? It’s the same question I ask of those opposed to same sex marriage. How does my definition of my homosexuality define your definition of whatever you decide to label yourself? I’ve always been of the opinion that labels are great for clothing and food, not so much for people. I get that labels are helpful with categorizing items and making things fit into predefined boxes, but I’m not a thing and I have yet to find a big enough box that can encompass the many facets of me. The only label I will accept is human. What does your label say?