Bookworm Sez - An Upbeat Guidebook for Before and After Coming Out

Yay! You’re Gay! Now What? A Gay Boy’s Guide to Life, by Riyadh Khalaf, c. 2019, Frances Lincoln,    $14.99, 223 pages

The light beneath the door is just a sliver.

It’s enticing, though, and you’re eager to see what’s on the other side, finally ready to open that door and come out. In Yay! You’re Gay! Now What? by Riyadh Khalaf, you’ll find some advice for doing it.

For a while, months, maybe years, you’ve been “feeling different.” You think you might be gay, and that’s “okay, it’s normal, and it’s not something you need to change,” Khalaf writes. Or you may be bi or pan or non-binary – “it simply comes down to how you feel” and it may have everything or nothing to do with the anatomy you got at birth. The thing to remember is that “YOU CANNOT CHANGE WHO YOU ARE.”

This may cause a lot of worry, for yourself and for people you love. Recognize that anxiety before it goes wild, and know how to break the cycle. Being gay, says Khalaf, is actually a gift, as you’ll eventually begin to see.

That’s a gift you can share or not, he says, because “you can come out whenever and however you want.” It’s your call. Yes, family members might freak out at first and your friends might retreat, but you’ll find advice on how to cope with that and a reminder that “almost every relationship is salvageable.”

So, let’s say you’re out, comfortable with it, and you’re ready to find your first true love. It’s OK to go online and look, but Khalaf says to be wary: You know how easy it is to pretend you’re someone you’re not when you’re on a computer, so be safe. Also be safe when you go to clubs or parties, and remember that protecting your heart is important, too. Relationships can be different, your first kiss can be amazing, and your body may respond in embarrassing ways to all of the above. And on that note, remember that consent is the new hot…

Here’s the key thing you’ll need to know about Yay! You’re Gay! Now What?: Absolutely anyone can read it – including parents and allies – but it’s really geared toward gay teen boys and young men. Indeed, Khalaf includes pages expressly for those allies and parents, but later parts of the book are filled with valid information that may be more graphic than they’ll want.

Still, that info will speak directly to the heart and the health of young men just coming out, in a way that’s not stuffy or clinical, but more lightheartedly factual. Khalaf is gay and he uses personal anecdotes as tools to teach, but he’s not pious or pushy. Instead, there’s a whole lot of care and camaraderie in these pages. The words “you are not alone” are not just written – they also leap from each page.

That could make this book a lifesaver for a young man with a dawning understanding but a short support system.

Yay! You’re Gay! Now What? is serious but fun to read, and it may help to shed some light.

 

 

 

 

WhistlePig + Alfa Romeo F1

SHOREHAM, VT (September 13, 2023) — WhistlePig Whiskey, the leaders in independent craft whiskey, and Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake are waving the checkered flag on a legend-worthy release that’s taking whiskey to G-Force levels. The Limited Edition PiggyBack Legends Series: Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake Barrel is a high Rye Whiskey selected by the Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake drivers, with barrels trialed in their wind tunnel to ensure a thrilling taste in every sip.

The third iteration in WhistlePig’s Single Barrel PiggyBack Legends Series, the Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake Barrel is bottled at 96.77 proof, a nod to Valtteri Bottas’ racing number, 77, and the precision of racing. Inspired by Zhou Guanyu, the first Chinese F1 driver, this Rye Whiskey is finished with lychee and oolong tea. Herbal and floral notes of the oolong tea complement the herbaceous notes of WhistlePig’s signature PiggyBack 100% Rye, rounded out with a juicy tropical fruit finish and a touch of spice.

Keep readingShow less
by Spectrum Medical Care Center

Nurse Practitioner Ari Kravitz

When I started medical transition at 20 years old, it was very difficult to get the care I needed for hormone replacement therapy because there are very few providers trained in starting hormones for trans people, even though it’s very similar to the hormones that we prescribe to women in menopause or cisgender men with low testosterone.

I hope more providers get trained in LGBTQ+ healthcare, so they can support patients along their individual gender journey, and provide the info needed to make informed decisions about their body. I’ve personally seen my trans patients find hope and experience a better quality of life through hormone replacement therapy.

Keep readingShow less

Descanso Resort swimming pool and lounge area

Descanso Resort, Palm Springs' premier destination for gay men, just received Tripadvisor's highest honor, a Travelers' Choice "Best of the Best" award for 2023. Based on guests' reviews and ratings, fewer than 1% of Tripadvisor's 8 million listings around the world receive the coveted "Best of the Best" designation. Descanso ranked 12th in the top 25 small inns and hotels category in the United States. Quite an accomplishment!

Open less than two years, Descanso Resort offers gay men a relaxing and luxurious boutique hotel experience just minutes away from Palm Springs' buzziest restaurants, nightclubs, and shopping. Descanso has quickly established itself as a top destination for sophisticated gay travelers, earning hundreds of 5-star guest reviews and consistently ranking in Trapadvisor's top positions alongside brother properties Santiago Resort and Twin Palms Resort.

Keep readingShow less