A Maori Tale of Coming Out

Kawa, the second book by author Witi Ihimaera that has been brought to the screen, is now out on DVD. Ihimaera has been internationally acclaimed for his bestselling book Whale Rider and the hit film based upon it.

“My greatest inspiration has been the stories of men and women struggling with difference and trying to change the world,” Ihimaera says. “Some of those people died -- and are still dying -- for what they believed and believe in.”

“My greatest triumph has been to write about Maori people and gay people in New Zealand -- by far the most put-down minorities in my country -- so that both our stories are heard.”

As the film opens, Kawariki appears to have everything. He’s a successful businessman of Maori descent living in Auckland, New Zealand, moving as easily within Maori circles as he does in the more westernized Pakeha society. He has a stunningly beautiful wife, Annabelle (Belle, for short); a rambunctious 16-year-old son; and a precocious 7-year-old daughter. He adores them all, and they, in turn, practically idolize him. They live in an elegant house, and everything comes across as perfect in their exotic and supremely picturesque world.

After all, this is a man who was brought up with strong sense of duty to be leader of his whanau (the Maori term for family), as well as his community. But appearances can be deceiving. Kawa has a deep and tightly kept secret -- one that has compelled him to move out of their home, leaving Belle desperately bewildered. Instead of communicating, though, her husband attempts to compartmentalize his life, clinging to the vain hope that he can continue doing so despite the havoc this duplicity threatens to wreak.

However, on the weekend that his elderly father is to step down, in accordance with their tribal traditions, and name him as the new head of their clan, his seemingly balanced existence becomes desperately complicated. The fact is that Kawa is gay, and his lover, a devoted but impetuous actor named Chris, is no longer willing to keep their relationship a secret. Having led a double life for so long, Kawa balks at revealing his true sexuality to his wife, kids, and conservative parents.

The film is adapted from Ihimaera’s Nights in the Gardens of Spain, and the book’s title is derived from a comment one character makes: “All of the nights in the ‘Gardens of Spain’ and we’ve never been introduced,” using the term as a euphemism for all the steam rooms, bathhouses, back-room bars and alleyways that are often so much a part of a closeted man’s shadowy world. At its heart, this is the novelist’s genuine coming-out experience -- or pretty close to it.

“Kawa is based on my own story of being a gay husband and father leaving his family and children because he has fallen in love with a young man,” Ihimaera says. “The warrior culture that I belong to could never condone anything that is less than masculine and, as a consequence, Maori gay men have been subjected to violence. Man is at the top, women are lower and, well, Maori gay men are the lowest of the low!”

First-time director Katie Wolfe allows the action to unfold naturally, in a leisurely way, bringing a subliminal feeling of normalcy to the most tumultuous events. With numerous wide shots of sumptuously photographed billowing clouds, sunsets, lush green vistas, and sparkling azure oceans, sandwiched between snippets of the modern Maori’s world, we’re given a first-class production that visually borders on hypnotic. Similarly, as with the original narrative, Kate McDermott’s screenplay doesn’t at all apologize for itself -- these are tough situations with tough consequences. No longer able to reconcile the way he’s been living, Kawa must make a choice, and innocent people are going to be hurt -- but most especially Kawa himself will be hurt, regardless of how he proceeds.

“I made a mistake -- I chose the wrong life,” he guilelessly confesses to his wife at one point.

Yet among the key elements that make this film so rare and remarkable is that, yes, it is definitely, fittingly and unapologetically pro-gay, but not at the expense or belittlement of anyone else’s viewpoint. In particular, it treats the beliefs of the Maori people with terrific respect even as it asserts the validity of its own position.

In the central role, Calvin Tuteao gives an award-worthy performance, presenting a handsome, mature, thoroughly likable and identifiable everyman. If he’s straddling several worlds (whether culturally or sexually), it certainly doesn’t show … at first. Then again, quite often the calmest smiles have been known to conceal the most complex emotions, and this is the case with Kawa.

Kawa ultimately parts with his wife to be with Chris, but their match, alas, is bittersweet. Nonetheless, as his would-be partner, Dean O’Gorman’s motivations are clear and on some level, rational. He’s involved with someone who insists on keeping their relationship (and him) under wraps. As it’s played out, following the guy he loves is not really the act of malice or neediness that it might be coming from a lesser talent in an inferior movie; more accurately, it’s a misguided hope for resolution that simply can’t occur.

Nathalie Boltt, too, is spot-on, as Kawa’s wife, Belle, a woman placed in the middle of near-overwhelming circumstances. Although she’s nobody’s victim, neither is she anyone’s villain. Rather, she’s a figure worthy of empathy, who ostensibly had everything, only to have it taken away for reasons entirely beyond her control.

Likewise, veteran actor George Henare portrays Kawa’s father, Hamiora, as well-rounded and believable. He loves his son, but is beleaguered by such a revelation, and the shocking awareness that nothing is as he thought it was or ever will be resounds in his every glance.

Successfully rounding out this “generational portrait” is Pana Hema-Taylor as Kawa’s strapping (if slightly headstrong) son, Sebastian. Here’s a lad searching for guidance, but like his father, he has grown up surrounded by deeply rooted customs that may not always conform with our increasingly puzzling and transitory world.

In the end, there are no absolute rights or wrongs. To its noteworthy credit, Kawa doesn’t go for easy answers. In this piece of “art,” as in life, some are wounded -- but they also maintain the ability to heal, and grow, and face (or at least strive for) better days. As shown in the final reel, the story happily notes above all that things are changing. That’s why at its conclusion, a refreshing balance is struck between realism and idealism that is rare in many LGBT offerings these days.

“Over the years, many Maori gay men have become their own gay ‘tribe’ and, supporting each other, have begun to change attitudes within our community,” Ihimaera stresses, then divulges: “I was the chairman of the first gay Maori and Polynesian men’s group in Auckland. So these days you can be gay and a warrior, too!”

An utterly outstanding release, Kawa is available on DVD through Wolfe Video. For more information or to order online, go to: www.wolfevideo.com .

WhistlePig + Alfa Romeo F1

SHOREHAM, VT (September 13, 2023) — WhistlePig Whiskey, the leaders in independent craft whiskey, and Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake are waving the checkered flag on a legend-worthy release that’s taking whiskey to G-Force levels. The Limited Edition PiggyBack Legends Series: Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake Barrel is a high Rye Whiskey selected by the Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake drivers, with barrels trialed in their wind tunnel to ensure a thrilling taste in every sip.

The third iteration in WhistlePig’s Single Barrel PiggyBack Legends Series, the Alfa Romeo F1 Team Stake Barrel is bottled at 96.77 proof, a nod to Valtteri Bottas’ racing number, 77, and the precision of racing. Inspired by Zhou Guanyu, the first Chinese F1 driver, this Rye Whiskey is finished with lychee and oolong tea. Herbal and floral notes of the oolong tea complement the herbaceous notes of WhistlePig’s signature PiggyBack 100% Rye, rounded out with a juicy tropical fruit finish and a touch of spice.

Keep readingShow less
by Spectrum Medical Care Center

Nurse Practitioner Ari Kravitz

When I started medical transition at 20 years old, it was very difficult to get the care I needed for hormone replacement therapy because there are very few providers trained in starting hormones for trans people, even though it’s very similar to the hormones that we prescribe to women in menopause or cisgender men with low testosterone.

I hope more providers get trained in LGBTQ+ healthcare, so they can support patients along their individual gender journey, and provide the info needed to make informed decisions about their body. I’ve personally seen my trans patients find hope and experience a better quality of life through hormone replacement therapy.

Keep readingShow less

Descanso Resort swimming pool and lounge area

Descanso Resort, Palm Springs' premier destination for gay men, just received Tripadvisor's highest honor, a Travelers' Choice "Best of the Best" award for 2023. Based on guests' reviews and ratings, fewer than 1% of Tripadvisor's 8 million listings around the world receive the coveted "Best of the Best" designation. Descanso ranked 12th in the top 25 small inns and hotels category in the United States. Quite an accomplishment!

Open less than two years, Descanso Resort offers gay men a relaxing and luxurious boutique hotel experience just minutes away from Palm Springs' buzziest restaurants, nightclubs, and shopping. Descanso has quickly established itself as a top destination for sophisticated gay travelers, earning hundreds of 5-star guest reviews and consistently ranking in Trapadvisor's top positions alongside brother properties Santiago Resort and Twin Palms Resort.

Keep readingShow less