From $10 trinkets with zip to big-ticket items that inspire LGBTQ togetherness (and nakedness), here are 12 nice – and sometimes naughty – ideas to make this Valentine's Day a fierce one.
Tell him “Boy, Hi!” with this Beyoncé-inspired five-pack pencil set (made exclusively by women – because who run the world? Girls!), each embossed in gold with a famous Bey-ism, like “I Ain’t Sorry,” “What Would Beyoncé Do?” and “I Twirl On Them Haters” – because fucking right she does. $10, shop.whohaha.com
2. Cafflano Klassic Coffee Maker
Take your better half on a getaway to remember – complete with “treasure” hunt! – that begins when you receive clues in the mail that lead you to a surprise destination. Cluventure develops vacation programs based on your travel and activity preferences, but where you’ll end up is a secret until departure day. LGBTQ-friendliness considered when booking. Price based on itinerary, cluventuretravel.com
Juices will flow when you open Tom of Finland’s Outstanding Red wine – a blend of Zinfandel, Merlot, Cabernet Sauvignon, and Petite Syrah – featuring labels of the brand’s iconic artwork. Afterward, start a collection of keepsake corks with a custom-made shadow box that promises everlasting companionship for couples that like to get hammered together. $24, tomoffindlandwines.com; $60, homewetbar.com
Dust off your sex-spiked vinyls (or spring for a new one, like Justin Timberlake’s just-released Man of the Woods LP) for a spin on the Bluetooth-enabled, social-connected TRNTBL for a filthy date night in, or, if you prefer a little more romance, play your personally recorded Vinylgram message to make him melt like hot chocolate in your pocket. $499, trntbl.co; $20, vinylgram.co
Yesteryear’s point-and-shoot camera meets today’s in-an-instant technology in Kodak’s Printomatic, which produces 2-inch by 3-inch full color and black-and-white photos with adhesive backing directly from the camera’s body. Start a scrapbook of your adventures with bae using the line’s decorating tools, like vibrant gel pen sets, mini photo punchers, border stickers, and more. $70, kodak.com
Quality time spent on the Rover Tandem trike – outfitted with a chro-moly steel frame, hand-built Velocity wheels, and Schwalbe Marathon tires – will help keep those calves of steel in shape even when you two skip leg day. $2,398, terratrike.com
New Jersey-based artist Dylan Wise takes still life to a bold new level with his daring graphite and colored pencil series Blooming Hard, featuring hand-drawn, at-attention penises (of real subjects) surrounded by a bouquet of delicate, never-wilting flower blossoms. Commissions of your own (or S.O.’s) member available; message the artist on Etsy. $80-$400, etsy.com/shop/bloomingbydylan
If you’re planning to pop the question this Valentine’s Day (or anytime thereafter), consider the newly launched “sky-high proposal” experience at OUE Skyspace LA, the tallest open-air observation deck west of the Mississippi. The Terrace for Two package – which takes place 1,000 feet above the City of Angels – includes a private chef-prepared dinner, three-string quartet playing "your" song, lighting display on the crown of the U.S. Bank tower to announce your engagement, a slide down Skyspace’s famous 45-foot Skyslide, and a private helicopter tour for your flyaway finale. Who could say no to that? Email for pricing details, oue-skyspace.com
Strip down and let somebody else take you to heaven with their hands with an on-demand massage via Soothe, offering spa-quality massages wherever you are. Make it an in-home couple’s retreat with deep tissue, Swedish, or sports massages plus all the accoutrements, including massage tables, fresh linens, lotions, oils, and relaxing music delivered right to your door. $119-$225, soothe.com
Ditch the heart-shaped boxes of Russell Stover and budget-busting perennials in favor of an offbeat approach to sweets and treats: Rancho Meladuco’s plump, juicy California dates paired with a bouquet of FrutaPOP’s boozy passion fruit champagne ice pops. A new nontraditional tradition is born (for less than the cost of those dead-in-a-day roses). $16-$18, ranchomeladuco.com; $60, frutapop.com
12. Hair-On Cowhide Shoes
Natural hair-on cowhide with unique mottled patterns will make a statement when y’all step out for dinner and a movie, but it’s also something you can feel good about: Each pair of Uwezos purchased provides a percentage of profits to Empower African Children to help students across the continent achieve higher education. $125-$165, uwezobrands.com