Latest On Outvoices
I’ve been told on occasion I clean up well. That usually means a person is so surprised to see me wearing a dress shirt and/or tie they have no control over projectile vomiting that nonsense phrase in my direction. What does that even mean? Is it an implication that I go through life “unclean” most of the time? Does it assert that I forgo washing my shorts and t-shirts regularly, in favor of simply pulling them out of the pile and Febreze-ing them for re-wear? Does it I suggest that I don’t regularly shower in favor of having B.O.?
Wait — do I have B.O.? You guys would tell me, right?
I’ve decided to just file this with “Things White People Say” and move on. (Send your letters of complaint to Mary, P.O. Box Calm Down, Snowflake, AZ.)
Over the last decade, my policy has been to wear a tie to job interviews and funerals. And I haven’t been to any funerals. My hesitation to “clean up” is not because I don’t like looking sharp — a word my father used to use and I’ve come to accept as a perfectly fine descriptive word but I also have started using the word “slacks” so that may tell you something. Rather, I don’t like getting dressed up. Perhaps if Rosie from The Jetsons could drop-kick me into a suit every morning, I wouldn’t mind walking around looking like I am someone who lives to work rather than works to live.
So, bypassing the process would make a difference … temporarily. However, after two hours of being dressed up, I will undoubtedly be thinking about when I can get out of this clown suit. I mean, that’s plenty of time for enough people to see how nice I can look and maybe even capture a few pictures for posterity (or, perhaps a better word would be proof).
I’ve been lucky enough that for my entire professional career I’ve had the luxury of being able to wear whatever I want to the office. (I understand this policy can be a slippery slope. For example; I once worked at a place that had to include “No Chaps” in the dress code section of its employee handbook. Now, why do you suppose they put that in there?) I’m not one to push that envelope too far, although the flip-flop of my flip-flops as I ascended the stairs at Echo when I worked here full-time was a signal to everyone that I was approaching.
Let’s just say, I like to be comfortable. A lot of folks advise you should dress for the job you want, not for the job you have. That’s why I always dress like a lottery winner. And, honestly, I think all of us should.
It’s certainly not my place to tell people they shouldn’t wear a suit to work every day. But how many people stop to ask themselves why they are doing it? Does it make them more effective? Does it recharge Kevin’s brain so he can crunch those numbers better, or provide
Steve with the inspiration to draw sketches of houses?
The simplest answer is that it is “professional.” But what is dressing professionally, other than what society has deemed as such? People adhere to that notion of dressing like a Stepford employee because that’s what their father did, and his father and his father. Some of the most unprofessional people I’ve met were wearing Armani, and some of the most professional were wearing Adidas.
My work-attire choices may have cost me in the past, sure. There’s no question it is the main reason I never became a lawyer or a captain of industry.
Still, I think our country would be much more chill (a word I am using to counterbalance “sharp” and “slacks”) if we all just did business in casual attire.
I understand many of you won’t or can’t join me in this, but I’ll still be dressing like I’m always headed to a BBQ.
Now here's a kink we bet you didn't think about.
When it comes to kinks and foreplay, what turns you on is unique to you. Now isn’t the time to get embarrassed - with 1 in 7 people having a foot fetish and 75% of the population having a dirty talk kink, fetishes come in all shapes and sizes. Foreplay triggers physiological and physical reactions, so finding what you like is super important. For a number of people shaving a sexual partner has become a popular fantasy but why? Body hair is already a hot topic, and with more and more people increasingly growing attracted to hair and hair removal – it's time to explore the kink.
Dirty Minds Media, an adult kink website who specialize in fetishes, knows that there is a stigma surrounding kinks and fetishes alike. They often receive questions and requests about the fact that people or perspective partners don’t understand the shaving fetish. The experts have shared their expertise, to help those facing challenges around wanting to embrace and partake in their fantasies.
What is a shaving kink?
Hair fetishes are widely spoken about, however a haircut fetishism or shaving fetish is what people are now particularly more interested in. Although shaving might seem like a tedious task, for me and you, for others it’s a right turn on. A kink is described as a consensual, non-traditional behaviour that creates sexual excitement – like with all kinks a shaving fetish comes in many forms. The act of a shaving fetish is to gain sexual arousal at the sight of; someone cutting your hair, watching a third party’s hair being shaved or shaving someone yourself – this can be on any part of the body that hair grows, including pubic hair.
Why does your partner want to shave you?
The question why relates back to social aspects. Pubic hair conversations are ongoing, society deemed (up until quite recently) that having pubic hair was undesirable – created by prejudice of cleanliness. But for your partner that wants to shave you, it’s probably associated with dominance, rather than personal hygiene, almost taking care of their partner. Much like pubic shaving, a shaven head has also become a kink too, being as they are affiliated with humiliation - linking back to a punishment of women who were caught fraternising with the enemy in World War II. Keeping in mind the idea of power, the humiliation element is now more obvious – so as a dominant it’s not hard to see why it’s sexually arousing.
Advice to approach the subject with your partner
Shaving your partner is a great way to explore your partner, the build-up can cause excitement and intensifies any future sexual experience to follow. But it can be uncomfortable to approach the subject especially if you aren't in a dominant and submissive relationship. The experts at Dirty Minds Media have provided you a short advice section to help you approach the subject of your kinks. It can be tricky to approach the topic of shaving your partner but if you have a fetish that you desire to explore, then communicate with your partner. If you fear feeling judged, try explaining that you’re sharing from a place of trust, it will help stop that embarrassment. Going in with the facts, details and context will also help you demystify your kink too. Starting small and easing the conversation slowly will help this. Finally, everyone should be understanding – each party will have something to say.